thanks pop for the great day! we love you!!
Thursday, June 12, 2008
strawberry picking with our buddy pop
today we had the pleasure of spending the day with my dad. since he is still working, we dont often get to spend a day with just him. yesterday was his last day of work until august - so we snapped him up on his first day off and went strawberry picking with the mothers of multiples.
thanks pop for the great day! we love you!!
thanks pop for the great day! we love you!!
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
stepford wife
i am sure a lot of you can relate to the pressures that we feel to be a good wife, and good mom, a good sister, a good daughter - all. at. once! how many hats do we wear? i gave up counting. i spend my days building my resume with things like hostage negotiator, sanitation worker, peace talk broker, short order cook, social director, chief of staff, financial wizard, etc. all roles that i didnt necessarily see myself playing, but nonetheless, i do them and even earn awards in some areas. in my former life, i designed web sites, some of which actually earned national recognition. but i am finding that there is nothing like a jelly-filled, stick to your cheek kiss that is planted full force by someone who loves you unconditionally.
somewhere along the line in this journey of motherhood i met a woman who i perceived to be excelling at wearing all these hats simultaneously. because she lived close by and we have children the same age, we spent a lot of time together by default. whenever i spent time with her, i would often leave feeling just a little worse about myself. i would be thinking things like: how does she always look so put together, is that another lilly pulitzer outfit? how does she serve a well-balanced hot meal for lunch every day? how does she get her children to eat without complaint? why do her whites look so bright? its only the first week of school - how did she already have time to buy halloween costumes? how did she already finish her christmas shopping, its only october? why did her house sell after only 11 days of being on the market? as time wore on, i began to see things for what they actually were. she only has one lily pulitzer outfit, which she has been wearing for the last 4+ years. she puts the tv on and her children eat lunch in a tv coma - it probably wouldnt matter if it were a bowl of rocks. things started to become clearer to me. i began referring to her at the stepford wife. it seemed fitting, and my mom mentioned it after having only met her a few times! i was happy for myself when the "sold" sign went up in front of her house. the reality is that even though she is now living in "the perfect house in her dream neighborhood" i myself have seen her driving by her old house on 3 separate occasions. apparently, dreamville, usa isnt so dreamy after all.
i guess the moral of the story is this:
-listen to your mom, she probably has more life experience.
-don't judge a book by its cover, once you remove the dust jacket its often a different story.
-be proud of your own accomplishments and dont waste time keeping up with the joneses.
-i could care less if my whites are glaringly white, i will gladly take a jelly stained outfit and remember fondly the sticky kiss that came along with it.
somewhere along the line in this journey of motherhood i met a woman who i perceived to be excelling at wearing all these hats simultaneously. because she lived close by and we have children the same age, we spent a lot of time together by default. whenever i spent time with her, i would often leave feeling just a little worse about myself. i would be thinking things like: how does she always look so put together, is that another lilly pulitzer outfit? how does she serve a well-balanced hot meal for lunch every day? how does she get her children to eat without complaint? why do her whites look so bright? its only the first week of school - how did she already have time to buy halloween costumes? how did she already finish her christmas shopping, its only october? why did her house sell after only 11 days of being on the market? as time wore on, i began to see things for what they actually were. she only has one lily pulitzer outfit, which she has been wearing for the last 4+ years. she puts the tv on and her children eat lunch in a tv coma - it probably wouldnt matter if it were a bowl of rocks. things started to become clearer to me. i began referring to her at the stepford wife. it seemed fitting, and my mom mentioned it after having only met her a few times! i was happy for myself when the "sold" sign went up in front of her house. the reality is that even though she is now living in "the perfect house in her dream neighborhood" i myself have seen her driving by her old house on 3 separate occasions. apparently, dreamville, usa isnt so dreamy after all.
i guess the moral of the story is this:
-listen to your mom, she probably has more life experience.
-don't judge a book by its cover, once you remove the dust jacket its often a different story.
-be proud of your own accomplishments and dont waste time keeping up with the joneses.
-i could care less if my whites are glaringly white, i will gladly take a jelly stained outfit and remember fondly the sticky kiss that came along with it.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
when animals attack
this, by the way, was before 9am as well. mommy really needed a shower, so she could haul herself and three kids to the dentist - they have been missing me there.
it was of course a pack mentality (note the roll of saran wrap tucked under his arm for safe keeping)...
spilled milk
why is it that when your last paper towel was used days ago and you have since been to the store twice and forgot to buy more both times; that is when your 4 year old decides to spill the whole cup of milk? it never happens when you have a new twenty pack of paper towels standing by at the ready. no never then! please help me, its not even 9am!
Monday, June 9, 2008
crap squared, at least
my mil is home from the hospital just today. what they were calling ovarian cancer is now being called peritoneal cancer. i am not exactly clear if the ovarian cancer spread and has caused this, or it was this all along. but basically its still not so good. they were not able to get all the cancer out and chemo will start in about a week or so. i think the prognosis is about the same. i am learning that a skill set apparantly never honed in my husbands family was communication. mil doesnt really want to talk about it at all, because "it's just so boring". umm, ok?! so information trickles down in dribs and drabs. its like playing that kindergarten telephone game, where the information gets fuzzier each time it gets passed along to the next person. and if one of those persons happens to be a man - its like double the fuzz. nonetheless, we are just going to press on.
my task for this week is to research hats for bald mil's. she has already declared that she will not be a wig lady, she will be a hat lady. this i can do.
****************************************
in totally unrelated and not so startling news. the guy who replaced j. in the supervisor position that he was forced to take for 8 months has already resigned. he lasted 2 weeks. crap!!!! do i have to remind you that this is what brought on the talk about TX???!!! crap!!!!! did i say that already?
my task for this week is to research hats for bald mil's. she has already declared that she will not be a wig lady, she will be a hat lady. this i can do.
****************************************
in totally unrelated and not so startling news. the guy who replaced j. in the supervisor position that he was forced to take for 8 months has already resigned. he lasted 2 weeks. crap!!!! do i have to remind you that this is what brought on the talk about TX???!!! crap!!!!! did i say that already?
summer is melting away
the days just seem to be flying right by us. summer is here WITH. A. VENGEANCE. what is with the 98 degree weather? (and why can't i find that little degree dohickey on my keyboard?) i dont know where my days are going, but tonight i said to someone in all seriousness - "excuse me, is today the 6th or the 7th?" she replied "oh honey, its the 9th" ok, what happened to the 8th - i totally missed that. i think this heat is melting my brain among other things. there was a time when i always knew what day it was, but that has long since past. clearly i am lucky to even be in the right week! the good news is, that since its the 9th, summer camp is that much closer!
i totally missed posting for m&k 18 month birthday, so more on that later this week. better late than never - right?
i totally missed posting for m&k 18 month birthday, so more on that later this week. better late than never - right?
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
weekend recap, yes i know its tuesday!
this weekend was a whirlwind, it took me until today to recover i think! friday morning started off cleaning puke up off of every surface within a 5 mile radius of my eldest. luckily the day, and the weekend improved from there. it was one of those random incidents where apparently f. felt much better afterwards and was fine the rest of the weekend. it was not really a treat dragging all three of them all over god's creation to find a triple frame that i wanted to give as a gift this weekend. i know i have more than the recommended 2.5 kids, but come on people, doesnt anyone have three pictures they would like to display at once?!?! i finally bought the last existing triple frame in the free world at a local craft store. done.
saturday we loaded the car and headed to connecticut. we packed lunch and didnt stop once the whole way there! the boys were absolutely fantastic! i still cant believe how great they were. no one got car sick, which was a big bonus for a car trip in our family. when we arrived we realized that the "all suites" hotel we had booked clearly has a very liberal interpretation of the word "suite". basically they deemed it to mean one big room, where you can not possibly place two pack n plays out of sight of the rest of the people in the room. so we settled in anyway and let the boys run a muck. we were supposed to meet SIL for dinner, but as is typical she never showed. after dinner and a little shopping we returned to the hotel to call it a night.
it was an interesting night. but once they did fall asleep, they stayed asleep, so for that i was thankful. i am sure the people in the rooms on either side, above and below us were thankful for that too!
saturday we got up and learned that the road in front of the hotel would be closed from 9am til noon for a cancer/walk/run/bike for hope event. luckily there was a fantastic park in walking distance. so we let the boys run and play for about an hour and a half; then headed back to attempt naps in our "suite". k. who was exhausted and feel asleep almost immediately, m. was another story. after naps we packed up and headed to j.'s grandfathers third wife's 90th birthday (did you follow that?).
she is a sprightly lady and i guess when you get to be her age you throw your own parties. it was fancy and not really kid friendly, even though she sent us a personal note on her formal invitation requesting that we come and bring the boys. again, the kids were a treat. they even tried caviar - there were not many options for the shorter set. considering the two little ones were basically attached to our hips the entire time, it felt like we were there for EVER. we had already mentioned that we would have to leave early to make the long trek back, and the birthday girl was totally fine with that. she was clearly pleased that we had even made the trip and brought the boys. nonetheless, as we try to gracefully make our exit, SIL feels the need to tell us (and anyone in a 5 mile radius) "you know, there is going to be cake!" really, who knew cake at a birthday party?!?! you gotta love the competition at this age to be better, more accommodating, all-knowing, just generally omnipotent at the ripe old age of 40. come on sister - grow the F up! yes, we know there is going to be cake, and we are still leaving. upon hearing this the honoree then feels the need to offer us a piece to take with us, even though it hadn't been cut yet. which was really sweet and totally unnecessary. of course we declined.
we got everyone back in the car and headed home - this time we stopped about eight hundred and fifty times. i think f. is going to have a career as a sanitation inspector when he grows up. he certainly checked out enough bathrooms on the way home. but we didnt even mind, because while in the car, everyone was so content. it was a great weekend and i am glad we made the effort.
***********************************
on a totally different note. we found out today that j.'s mom has stage 3 ovarian cancer. she had pretty major surgery today where they removed multiple tumors and performed a complete hysterectomy. her body was so riddled with tumors, that they told her they removed her appendix because it had tumors on it. turns out, she has long been without her appendix and what they removed was actually another sizable tumor. unfortunately the news might get worse on thursday when they remove some fluid that is building up in her lungs. if indeed that is cancerous as well, she will be downgraded to stage 4.
its no secret that i have struggled to find the redeeming values in my relationship with MIL. but obviously i dont wish this on anyone. at the end of the day, i have my best friend in the world, because of her. i am trying to be a good daughter in-law, wife, etc. its going to be a difficult summer i predict. chemo will start as soon as they feel she has had time to recover from todays surgery. if you have any experience with this, please take this opportunity to delurk and share what you can in the comments today.
saturday we loaded the car and headed to connecticut. we packed lunch and didnt stop once the whole way there! the boys were absolutely fantastic! i still cant believe how great they were. no one got car sick, which was a big bonus for a car trip in our family. when we arrived we realized that the "all suites" hotel we had booked clearly has a very liberal interpretation of the word "suite". basically they deemed it to mean one big room, where you can not possibly place two pack n plays out of sight of the rest of the people in the room. so we settled in anyway and let the boys run a muck. we were supposed to meet SIL for dinner, but as is typical she never showed. after dinner and a little shopping we returned to the hotel to call it a night.
it was an interesting night. but once they did fall asleep, they stayed asleep, so for that i was thankful. i am sure the people in the rooms on either side, above and below us were thankful for that too!
saturday we got up and learned that the road in front of the hotel would be closed from 9am til noon for a cancer/walk/run/bike for hope event. luckily there was a fantastic park in walking distance. so we let the boys run and play for about an hour and a half; then headed back to attempt naps in our "suite". k. who was exhausted and feel asleep almost immediately, m. was another story. after naps we packed up and headed to j.'s grandfathers third wife's 90th birthday (did you follow that?).
she is a sprightly lady and i guess when you get to be her age you throw your own parties. it was fancy and not really kid friendly, even though she sent us a personal note on her formal invitation requesting that we come and bring the boys. again, the kids were a treat. they even tried caviar - there were not many options for the shorter set. considering the two little ones were basically attached to our hips the entire time, it felt like we were there for EVER. we had already mentioned that we would have to leave early to make the long trek back, and the birthday girl was totally fine with that. she was clearly pleased that we had even made the trip and brought the boys. nonetheless, as we try to gracefully make our exit, SIL feels the need to tell us (and anyone in a 5 mile radius) "you know, there is going to be cake!" really, who knew cake at a birthday party?!?! you gotta love the competition at this age to be better, more accommodating, all-knowing, just generally omnipotent at the ripe old age of 40. come on sister - grow the F up! yes, we know there is going to be cake, and we are still leaving. upon hearing this the honoree then feels the need to offer us a piece to take with us, even though it hadn't been cut yet. which was really sweet and totally unnecessary. of course we declined.
we got everyone back in the car and headed home - this time we stopped about eight hundred and fifty times. i think f. is going to have a career as a sanitation inspector when he grows up. he certainly checked out enough bathrooms on the way home. but we didnt even mind, because while in the car, everyone was so content. it was a great weekend and i am glad we made the effort.
***********************************
on a totally different note. we found out today that j.'s mom has stage 3 ovarian cancer. she had pretty major surgery today where they removed multiple tumors and performed a complete hysterectomy. her body was so riddled with tumors, that they told her they removed her appendix because it had tumors on it. turns out, she has long been without her appendix and what they removed was actually another sizable tumor. unfortunately the news might get worse on thursday when they remove some fluid that is building up in her lungs. if indeed that is cancerous as well, she will be downgraded to stage 4.
its no secret that i have struggled to find the redeeming values in my relationship with MIL. but obviously i dont wish this on anyone. at the end of the day, i have my best friend in the world, because of her. i am trying to be a good daughter in-law, wife, etc. its going to be a difficult summer i predict. chemo will start as soon as they feel she has had time to recover from todays surgery. if you have any experience with this, please take this opportunity to delurk and share what you can in the comments today.
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